Getting back on track after a bad fortnight
The regression is over and the nights have not recovered, because two weeks of doing whatever worked has left you with things you now do every night. This is a separate piece of work and it is straightforward.
4 min read
During a bad fortnight everybody reaches for what stops the crying fastest, and that is the right call at the time. The consequence is that by the end of it your baby has learned a new set of expectations - a feed at 2am, being rocked back to sleep, a parent lying on the floor, a bedtime that now takes an hour.
These are not permanent and they are not evidence you handled it wrongly. They are just habits, formed quickly, and they come apart in roughly the same time they took to form.
Work in this order
First, get the schedule right again. Wake windows have probably moved during the fortnight, and your baby is a few weeks older. Fix the timing before touching anything else - some of the night waking will resolve here on its own.
Then bedtime. The start of the night is the easiest place to change anything, because sleep pressure is highest. Whatever new thing crept in, unpick it here first.
Then the last wake of the night. The early-morning wake is usually the softest of the night wakes and the next easiest to change.
Then the middle. The 1am to 3am wakes are the hardest and should be last. They frequently resolve on their own once bedtime is sorted.
One thing at a time, four nights each. Two nights tells you nothing. Changing two things at once tells you nothing either.
How to unpick a habit
Reduce rather than remove. If you have been feeding back to sleep, shorten the feed a little each night. If you have been rocking to sleep, rock until drowsy and put them down awake. If you have been lying on the floor, move the chair a little further from the cot every few nights.
The ladder of help is useful here too: offer the smallest intervention first and climb only if you must. What tends to change first is the length of each wake rather than the number, and that is the signal to watch for.
You did what worked at the time. Now do what works now - one thing, four nights, in order.
How long it takes
One to three weeks for most families, and less than the fortnight took if you start soon after it ends. The longer a habit runs after the disruption has passed, the more established it becomes, so this is worth beginning within a week or two rather than waiting for a convenient moment.
Expect a few nights of protest at each change. That is your baby noticing, which is exactly what has to happen for anything to change.
How to tell it is working
The first thing to change is duration rather than frequency. A wake that took forty minutes taking twelve is progress, even though the count on the page is identical. Most people miss this, because they are counting wakes and the count does not move for another week.
The second is where in the night the improvement appears. Bedtime settles first, then the early-morning wake, then the middle of the night. If bedtime is going well and 2am is unchanged after a week, that is the sequence working as expected rather than a partial failure - and the 2am wake frequently resolves without you touching it.
When not to start
Do not begin the unpicking during illness, teething, a new leap, the week before a holiday, or the fortnight around starting nursery. Each of those guarantees that a reasonable plan produces a poor result, and you will conclude the plan was wrong.
Equally, do not wait for a perfect month, because there is not one. What you want is two or three ordinary weeks with nothing scheduled in them. If you can see one coming, put it in the diary and start then rather than beginning on the first day you feel able.
When to stop troubleshooting
If sleep never recovers despite the schedule being right and the habits unpicked, or if there is snoring, mouth breathing, pauses in breathing, poor weight gain or persistent daytime exhaustion, that is a conversation with your GP or health visitor rather than another fortnight of adjustments.
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Take the 3-min quiz →General guidance, not medical advice. Your paediatrician's advice takes precedence.
